I first shared this quote from TobyMac’s Facebook page two years ago. This past week it popped up on my Facebook’s “on this day” page, and literally made me gasp. I had forgotten all about it. This quote had struck me hard two years ago. I had been writing pieces of my book off and on for several years. I struggled with doubt and worried about what others would think, but it remained an idea in my mind that never left. I didn’t know what I would do with a book about my heart experiences, but this quote got my attention. It was the first time I finally thought of my mess as my mission. Maybe the book was what God was going to use for His purpose in my life. I didn’t think my story was a big deal, so I started to pray. More and more the idea of writing a book about my heart surgeries stuck in my head. So I decided to take a step…or a tip-toe as it were. I started to write a page a day. First, if I found the time, and then more and more of my story started coming out. As I was writing I wondered where God was taking me and what He was planning to do with this book. “Our ways are not His ways” kept coming back to me. So I wrote, and wrote, and wrote…and after about two years I had enough written down to make a book. A short book, but a book no less.
As I am in the final steps making this book a reality I find myself battling with my self-confidence demons more and more. “No one will care.” “No one will read this book or your blog.” “Your story is no big deal.” I recently confided my concerns in a couple of my closest friends and I was reminded that when you are on God’s path for your life the devil will do all that he can to get you off that path. My mental battles were actually spiritual battles that I hadn’t recognized. Spiritual. Not just in my head, but in my heart and soul. I was reminded by my sweet friends that I am a daughter of the Most High, One and Only God. I believe in God with my whole heart. Everything I do is to bring Him glory, including this book. I am not perfect, nor will I ever be. I am saved by the blood of Jesus on the cross and the word of my testimony. The word of MY testimony. Meaning others could possibly come to know Jesus as their personal savior because I shared my story. WOW! How small and insignificant I have been feeling, but God says I am important! Everything I have been through will help others get through their own struggle, and possibly find God through it. Then how can I not share my story!
I am now excited and eager to get my book into the hands of people who need it. Please be praying for me as I am in the final stages of getting it to print. I am hoping it will be ready to go by October, but stay tuned for more updates. Also, please pray for me that I will be able to be a light in the darkness, and unafraid of the path God is leading me down. I want to take bold, confident steps knowing that HE is with me the whole way.
Thank you in advance, my friends.